Little Frustrations

Life has it's little frustrations; smiling at a stranger only to have them look at you like you're crazy, trying to merge onto the freeway but no one lets you in, asking simple questions in an effort to make conversation with a person but only getting single syllable answers. These things really piss me off and rather that scream and swear at the people who preform these acts of rudeness I just thought I used the internet as a way to vent. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, well that feels better. Thank you!

I'm Selfish!

It's strange the changes we make as we grow older and mature into the people that we are meant to become. We have pit falls, we make mistakes, and we face things that we are positive we will never get through or recover from. We are presented with a number of paths to take and often aren't sure which one is the best. The challenges that arise in life come for each person at different times, seeing as how I'm 21, a junior college graduate, and about to make some very significant changes in my own young life. I seem to be facing such challenges, ie; where do i go from here? Do i want to go back to school? And what do I want to go back for?

It can be overwhelming trying to figure out my life, trying to maybe catch a glimpse of the future. I worry and wonder if the decisions I'm making in my day to day life are the right ones for me or for others. If you think about it thats a heck of a lot of pressure for a "kid" ( which is what I am to everyone I work with...).

And then it dawns on me... in the eyes of my family, my friends, and society in general I'm a freaking infant! And I don't have to have all of the answers right now I just have to know that I'm doing what's good for me.

One of my very favorite people in the world once told to be selfish, because this will be the only time in my life that I will ever get the chance to just care about ME...

Week One Down!

Well friends I have actually done it! I, Breann Nicole Perkins have successfully completed my first week as an official CNA. For those who are not familiar with this particular abbreviation it stands for Certified Nursing Assistant. My job basically consists of being ordered around by and doing everything RN's do not want to do.

I.E. bathing, changing, dressing, feeding, and all around taking care of people who need a little extra help. While some (including myself for a period of time) would consider this a demeaning, disgusting, or all around just awkward profession...I will say " Shame on you...and me ". I am being completely honest when I say that while I was incredibly excited that got the job I was scared out of mind that I would hate it! But i must say I have never enjoyed anything more, yes my job is hard and exhausting but it's fun and rewarding. I like knowing that in some small way I'm making someones day a little brighter.

Break for an experience from 06/26:

Last night while assisting a resident in preparing for bed, I was asked to take off her anti-embolic stockings ( socks that help prevent further swelling of already swollen legs. keeping individual from having dangerous blood clots form.). After removing them I noticed how tight and painfully swollen her feet and ankles were. So I offered her a foot massage for comfort. I have never seen anyone so happy. She thanked me profusely and said she'd never had one before, she then claimed to have become converted to "the foot massage revolution!" It was a nice feeling knowing I helped in that small way:)

So to wrap up, I LOVE my new job. Not only is the facility wonderful, but my coworkers are great as are the residents. Each day is a new adventure and a new learning experience that I am truly grateful to be part of.

I Couldn't sleep. So it was either this or knitting...

Ok it's 4:13 in the morning and I ( unfortunately) am still awake. You would think after an exhausting 8hr shift I would be ready to crash. And heres the crazy thing, I totally am I just have a billion and 4 things running through my mind. I just need to shut it down... so here's the question I'm posing this evening, night, morning...? When your mind won't turn off and allow you to sleep what do YOU do?

Oh and PS for those of you who are wondering where and and why I would be working an 8hr shift I was recently hired as a full time CNA for a healthcare facility in North Phoenix. And believe me when i tell you that my job is EXHAUSTING!

Clinical Adventures!

Ok so I haven't said much or anything at all about CNA clinicals... up until today I haven't wanted to, to be perfectly honest. I really, really, REALLY hate them as it turns out... Im sorry but it takes an incredibly special person to be able to work in a nursing home, nursing center, or hospice type facility. And come to find out, I am not that person. It's not that I don't like helping the residents, I do, most of them are pretty cool. it just makes me beyond sad, oh and nursing homes kind of suck. A smarter idea would be to get trained and take care of your loved ones at home...just my opinion sense actually working at one for 3 weeks!
Anyway I have something exciting to share (well exciting to me Iguess)!!! Today we got to have clinicals at the hospital! Now many of you might not care, but I was shocked that we got to go to the hospital because I was unaware that CNA's were able to work in hospitals. But they are, so i was so looking forward to today and as it turns outs I had good reason to be. Not only was it a huge learnig experience but I found out that as a CNA I can work in OB!! Thats rigth I can work in the maternity ward...and if you know me you know thats a HUGE deal :)
I spent 2 hours in OB today and I know forsure that I have to become a labor and delivery nurse. I actually got to help admit 2 pregnant women today, it was very exciting and educational! Just thought I would say my good new minute ;)

A little inspiration from Colbie Caillat...Lucky

Wow... it's been awhile, a long while sense I've been on here. But I was up and had the strangest urge to blog it out. And I will more than likely get asked a million questions about this specific entry, so for those who might actually read this... do me a favor and DON'T read INTO it!

Well like I said I was up, which is normal for me. But I'm listening to a song by Colbie Caillat and Jason Maraz ( for those who haven't listened to them, get from under your rock and get on google!) called "Lucky". The song is about being in love with your best friend, and how lucky to be that person who is in love with their best friend and all the great things go along with being in love with your best friend. And it dawned on me... What would it be like to be in love with your best friend? Now I know every married person that reads this is going to say, " Well Bre it's great, i mean I am in love with my best...I married my best friend!" And thats all well and great, but it's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about that one person who has been your friend sense birth, the one you played with when you were 5, the one you went to high school with, the one can sit in silence with and feel perfectly normal with or totally crazy...whatever the occasion! That is the Best Friend I'm referring to.

Now most of you now that I have moved yet again... this time to Thatcher, AZ to go to school at EAC. Being that I'm here in yet ANOTHER small town, everyone knows each other including all my church leaders. Well today was my first Sunday at the singles ward down here and all the Bishops spoke in our combined Relief Society/Priesthood meeting ( there are 4 singles wards, but in the summer we all meet together). And wouldn't you know it the topic of choice for all 4 Bishops that spoke was....MARRIAGE!!! If that's not an obvious smack to all us single people... just kidding!
Anyways, yes the topic was marriage but along the lines of always keeping an eye out for the kind of person we want to spend eternity with. Which of course got me thinking about the list I had to make as a beehive talking about all the "qualities" I want in my future husband. I would share it, but I want to hold on to my dignity for just a little bit longer. So while I was pondering that ridiculous list, the Bishop of the 3rd ward got up to speak. And this is where the song reference comes in, he married is honest to goodness best friend! They knew each other as children, dated in high school and were married after his mission.

I LOVE THIS! How simple, yet complex, how beautiful yet messy! I mean you have to think that marrying your very best friend would be crazy amazing...the one person in the world who already knows your secrets before you tell them, who has seen the bad and ugly WAY before they see the good and beautiful. The one person who knows you inside and out, upside down and right side up. The one you shared gummy bears and crayons with before hugs and kisses. How...magical!

So you can understand why this song led my to pose this question... What would it be like to be in love with you best friend?

I think I pretty much envy those people who are lucky enough to marry their honest to goodness best friend :)

I'm back!

So have been a total slacker on this blog, and for those who actually care about my pathetic life and dont' fall asleep while reading it ( which can't be many of you...because I fall asleep just thinking about my life:( ) I apologize! So here are some highlights over the last month...I Went to AZ!! And oh my goodness it was awsome, Catleyn graduated ( who would have guessed that would happen :) JK Cate, I know you could do it!), Darce turned 16, and I got to see my entire psycho family(I also got to see Andy and his adorable girlfriend!) ! It was great... pictures anyone...

This Andy and Cam is girlfriend! She's Awsome!